Fanfic: New Beginnings

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Chapter 3

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Months later

Gillian Anderson walked from the pouring rain in to the warm set. It was November now, and they had already finished 8 episodes for the season, which was going to start on TV next week. Today started a new episode which would more than likely air around February for the sweeps. The plot? Scully would find out more about where Mulder was at with William, and Doggett and Scully would finally kiss.

She had been dreading this. It wasn't like she hated Robert, she liked him, she thought he was a terrific actor and a great friend, but she didn't want to kiss him. It seemed so... well, she didn't know how to describe it, but Gillian didn't know to describe anything anymore.

She had been bitter ever since the day Chris had talked to them about what would take place this year. Some days, she'd walk in and be silent. It seemed she wasn't there in person or in mind. Gillian walked in a daze, completely unaware what was going on around her. Other days, would walk in for work like it was "that time of the month". She'd be hateful, crouchy, snappy, furious at the whole world. She never smiled, or laughed, or played the practical jokes she used to play. Gillian wasn't the same anymore. And just about everyone knew why, too.

As she appeared on the set, everyone seemed to look up from their work for a moment and then continued on, just see what kind of mood she was in. Sighing, Gillian muttered her good mornings and said she was going to her trailer.

When she reached the trailer, she saw that the door was locked. Her trailer was never locked. Cursing, she looked around for a stage hand, someone who would have the key to unlock it for her. Gillian then saw a familiar young girl walk up to her with a keychain. The girl pulled some auburn hair back from her face and looked for the key to unlock the trailer. "Sorry, boss's orders to have the trailer locked. I guess I forgot this one this morning, forgive me," the girl spoke.

Gillian pulled the girl around and recognized her. She was the girl who was carrying the tray of food on the first day back to work.

"Meredith right?" Gillian asked.

Meredith smiled brightly, it was nice to know that a famous celebrity could remember a stage hand's name. She nodded and then went back to look for the key. After finding it, she unlocked the door for Gillian and pushed it open. "I'm sorry it was locked, Miss Anderson. Next time, yours will be the last one locked and the first one open. I won't forget."

Gillian gave the girl a small smile and went into the trailer. "Thanks," she said quietly and was getting ready to shut the door when Meredith held the door and looked at her.

"I guess it's not my place to stick my nose in, but why do you seem so angry one day and the next so depressed?"

Gillian looked at the girl in amazement. This girl didn't know her, and she didn't have to try and pry her way into her life. And was her mood changes that noticeable? Gillian hoped not. She gave Meredith a stern look and tried to shut the door again. Meredith held the door and spoke to her again.

"Look, I know you must be thinkin I'm crazy, or whatever. But somethin is wrong wit ya and I'm coming to you as a friend, though we don't know each other. Now, you can tell me what's up or leave it be. Take it or leave it."

Gillian sighed and studied Meredith. She reminded Gillian of herself at that age; hard, cold, not taking any bullshit. She considered telling her what was wrong, but then again, this was a kid who worked part time. Why should Gillian tell HER? Couldn't she talk to a therapist or someone like that?

After a moment, Meredith sighed and let go of the door. "Look, I think I may know part of the reason why you're so upset sometimes," she spoke in a soft voice, "it seems that this episode ya'll are ready to film has you and Doggett kissin, and I'm guessin you don't want that."

Gillian closed her eyes, this girl was bright. She was hitting the target just right.

"And since David Duch...what his name-"

"David Duchovny," Gillian corrected her quickly.

"Well, since David isn't back, things aren't the same. Am I right?"

Before Gillian could answer her, a voice over the P.A. system called Gillian to report for the set and called for the stage hands to report to their stations.

"Well, work calls," Meredith said as she walked away from the trailer. Gillian was still standing her trailer in thought when the girl turned around and said; "Don't worry, your secret is safe with me about David, Miss Anderson."

Gillian watched her walk off and then closed her trailer door. 'Screw them on the set, they can just come and get me,' she thought as she took deep breaths. How could this girl know? Was it that noticeable that Gillian missed David? Gillian did think that her performance as Scully was slow and drained. But could that say it all? Apparently. She did know she was moody, but what could be caused from anything. Did everyone think she missed David so much that it killed her? Well, she'd show them. She wasn't going to mope around the set anymore, acting like she was in mourning.

'Get a hold on yourself, Gillian. You can't act like this for the rest of your life. You don't love him, you just care deeply about him.'

Rubbing her eyes, Gillian prepared herself to go back out. She had to be strong, she had to concentrate and be focused. Gillian knew she had a strong will, if she could live through what happened with Piper and Clyde, she could certainly live without David.

With pride, Gillian stood up straight and composed herself. "Gillian Anderson, you are going to straighten up and work like you know to work. You are going to be strong and get over David. He's married and has a life of his own. He chose that, not you. You're going to get over that," she said to herself.

She turned and opened the door and walked proudly to the set. "David, you're out of my life," she said to herself and greeted the surprised cast with a big smile.

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David Duchovny quickly and quietly tried to get dressed that morning like a young boy who was going out his window to meet his girlfriend in the middle of the night. Only, he was going to sneak out and visit everyone on the set in the middle of the morning. He knew Tèa wouldn't approve of him going to the set, it was his old work place, she said. Only going back would want him to come back to work because it would make him feel guilty about leaving. Well, that might be true, but he wanted to see everybody anyway.

Going into his closet, he pulled out a pair of jeans and his favorite gray T-Shirt. He dressed quickly and went into the bathroom to fix his hair. But as he went to the bathroom, he stubbed his toe against the door, causing him to let out a painful shout. He covered his mouth and looked over to see his wife stir around in bed, but she didn't wake up.

'I feel like Tom Cruise in Mission Impossible', David thought, rubbing his toe. He looked back at Tèa and saw that he was still in the clear. After straightening his hair and brushing his teeth, the next thing he would have to do would was to find his shoes.

Only he didn't know where he had put them the night before.

Walking around their master bedroom, David searched frantically. He knew that if he didn't hurry and leave, Tèa would catch him. He knew if she found him sneaking off..But he felt like he needed to visit the set. He hadn't called or talked to anyone from the set since last April, and he felt awful for not doing so.

After not finding his shoes in their bedroom, David cursed under his breath and went into the hallway. Maybe he had taken them off last night in Maddy's room, or maybe the room where he kept his Jade elephants. He peered into each room on the right side of the hall, but found no shoes.

David walked into the last room upstairs, Maddy's room. He tiptoed onto the hardwood floor, hoping that he wouldn't step on a creaky board and wake her. That would be worse than waking up Tèa. He knew if he woke his daughter up, that'd be the end of it.

After seeing that his shoes weren't in the room, he turned around slowly to go downstairs, maybe he left them in the living room or out in the-

All of a sudden a low moaning creak came from the hardwood floor. David froze in fear as he thought the loud sound would wake his sleeping daughter. Turning his head, he saw that his little girl hadn't moved. The sound didn't wake her up. Did it wake Tèa? He hoped not.

David quickly rushed down the stairs and searched for his shoes. He looked in the living room, the den, the kitchen, the playroom, but didn't find his shoes.

'I'll go in my sandals if I have to,' thought David as he went into the kitchen to grab a drink of orange juice. He heard his dog, Blue, running into the room, excited to see his owner. Blue ran up to David and jumped on top of him, begging to play. David fell back against the counter, with the glass of orange juice in his hands. The shaggy dog barked at him and jumped back on David, causing the glass to fall to the floor with a loud crash.

"Aw shit," David cursed loudly and bend down to pick up the broken pieces. Now he knew he was caught. If Tèa didn't hear Blue's barking and the sound of the glass falling to the ground... it wasn't before long that David's worse fears were confirmed

"David? Honey, are you okay?"

David cringed and hurried to pick up the pieces of the broken glass. He had to hurry and leave. He had to go the set and see everybody. He would go crazy if he didn't. David heard the sounds of Tèa's feet run down the steps and threw the pieces of glass into the garbage can. He ran and grabbed the mop and started to mop up the spilled orange juice. He saw Tèa appear in the kitchen with her robe on.

"Sweetie, are you okay? What happened?"

David looked up at her. "I was thirsty and wanted a drink of orange juice," he said as he mopped.

"Uh huh...and why are you dressed?"

'Shit', David thought. He stopped mopping and went to put it up. "Um...well..you know how I usually can tell if something can happen? I thought I would drop the orange juice so when I did drop it, I'd have to go get another glass to match the china set so you know.." David explained. He went past his wife to the front door. She looked at him, staring in confusion.

"Honey...I don't-"

"So now I got to go the china store and buy a damn glass because I broke the one in here, so I'll see you later."

Tèa shook her head and looked at her husband.

"David, the china shop doesn't open til 10, it's only 9 something in the morning."

He ignored her comment and put on the sandals. He grabbed his car keys and looked at his wife with her arms crossed. David walked over and kissed her cheek. "Honey, you know how traffic is, it'll take me an hour to get there. Bye, talk to you later." He rushed to the door and was about to go out when he heard Tèa say;

"Well, I hope the traffic won't be to bad, since we're a mile from the store."

David pulled the door closed and ran out to the car in the rain. 'I made it,' he thought as he turned the ignition. He pulled out of the driveway and drove towards the set.

Little did he know, Tèa watched from the window and saw him drive towards the interstate, and not the way to the china store. She sighed softly and walked from the window.

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Back on the set

"Now, Gillian and Robert, I figured we could do the "big scene" first so we can go ahead and get the lite scenes done, if you don't mind," Chris Carter said as he walked on the set. Robert glanced over at Gillian. "A lite scene? Hell, this will be the scene everybody will be talking about," he said. Gillian nodded and looked at her script. The scene was called for at the end of the episode. Scully has learned that Mulder was just at her apartment and had left a note saying that he would return soon. Doggett comes to her apartment to find her very emotional and when Scully makes the comment that she doesn't want to be alone anymore, Doggett answers in return that he feels the same way and leans in for a kiss. Gillian couldn't believe that Chris had written this in the show. But, she couldn't do anything about it. He wouldn't change the scene, no matter how much she begged him to.

Kim Manners, the director, told the two actors to get ready. Gillian took a deep breath and got into her character. She was nervous. She had never kissed Robert before and she didn't know what to expect. If she was kissing David, that would be different. And, Scully and Doggett were wrong for each other in her opinion. Doing this scene wouldn't feel right.

Robert winked at her as he walked toward the door where Doggett would come in from. Gillian smiled back and and walked to her place. The director got behind the camera and called for silence. The stage was set.

"And action," he said.

Scully started to cry as she read the letter that Mulder had left for her to find. "I shall return to you soon," the letter said. Scully slumped into the chair beside her and began to sob. She had suffered so much pain in the last few weeks with the disappearance of Mulder and of their child that she didn't know if she could take much more of it. A sound was heard at her apartment door and Agent Doggett walked in to see her crying. He rushed over to her and pulled her in his embrace. Scully sobbed into his shirt and wrapped her arms around him. Scully knew she shouldn't do this. She loved Mulder, not Doggett. But she needed to be held.

Doggett ran his fingers through her auburn hair and saw the letter sitting on the table. He then knew why she was crying. Sometimes he couldn't understand why Mulder did this to such an incredible woman like Scully. Didn't Mulder see how lucky he was to have her?

"Agent Scul- Dana, are you okay?" Doggett asked as Scully lifted her head. He had called her by her first name. Doggett called her 'Dana'. That was a first.

"Yes..." Scully said and wiped her tears. "No...wait...I'm not..."

Doggett looked at her with concern.

"I guess I'm just tired of being treated like this...you know...everything is perfect and then he's gone. And now...he leaves this behind which tells me he's here, but he's not coming back right now...that maybe he doesn't want to come back right now."

Scully sniffled and looked at Doggett.

"I'm tired of being alone," she spoke finally.

Doggett wiped a tear from her cheek and leaned in to kiss her. "I know what you mean," he breathed as his lips neared hers. They were about to kiss when-

"Doggett, what the hell do you think you're doing?" A familiar voice shouted as Gillian and Robert's lips neared each other's. The cast and crew turned to see David Duchovny walking towards them with a huge smile.

Gillian's eyes widen and saw that David's eyes were focused on her. Her breath quicken and her heart pounded against her chest. She didn't even notice that Robert had pulled away from her.

So much for saying David was out her life.

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Chapter 4

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Kim Manners yelled "Cut!" and turned around to see his former actor walking towards them. "I got that on tape, maybe we should use that," he laughed as David walked over, giving him a hug. Everyone walked over to hug and shake hands with David. They were all excited to see him.

Chris Carter stood away from the crowd, trying to figure out why the hell he came back to visit. Chris remembered on the night of his going away party that David told him he would never come back, that the place would remind him of good times, which could persuade him to come back to the show. David appeared to be happy and looked better from the last time Chris had saw him.

"David, nice for you to come and interrupt my scene with Gillian, I was about to get some," Robert pushed his way through the crowd and ginned at David. David laughed at him and glanced over at Gillian, who still hadn't moved. She appeared frozen, like a deer caught in headlights. David looked back at Robert and playfully punched his arm. "You had nothing, you only thought you were getting some," he joked. The two laughed out loud.

Gillian stood with her arms folded across her chest, her eyes never leaving David. Why had he come here? Why after so long did he decided to drop by for a quick hello? She didn't understand why he was here, and who was he here to see. Did he come by to see her? To talk to Chris? Or was this a simple visit to the set to see and talk to his old friends and talk about the good times they had together? Whatever his reason, she didn't want to see him. His appearance would only make things worse. Gillian turned her back to the crowd and walked off the set, she didn't want to see him. She didn't even want to be around him. Not now anyway.

The crowd that had formed around David has spread out and he was finally able to breathe. He looked around the set to see where Gillian had went and saw she was gone from the set. Sighing, he asked several crew members where she had gone. "Try looking in her trailer," one said, "she usually spends half the day there anyway."

David walked off from the set to look for Gillian's trailer. Why hadn't she come over to say "Hi," to him? Was she angry? Was something the matter? Had he had done something to her that would cause her not to speak to him? David had to find out. She was one of the main reasons of his coming here. He wanted to talk to her.

David had found the trailer and saw that Robert had his trailer right beside hers. 'Odd,' he thought to himself. 'Robert's trailer wasn't beside hers last year, mine was. They've moved his trailer beside hers.' He took a deep breath and walked up the steps to her trailer. He knocked on the cold medal door and waited for her to answer him. Not a voice was heard from the inside of the trailer. Was she even in there?

"Gillian, it's me! Can I come in?" David asked as he put his face against the cool door. He waited for her reply but nothing was said. Sighing, he slowly turned the doorknob. "Gill, I'm coming in now," David called out and slowly opened the door to her trailer. David walked in and closed the door behind him. He found papers, books, and scripts thrown about on the floor, shirts, pants, and more papers were on the couch. Her desk, which once was decorated in pictures and books were gone. Only a picture of her daughter was on the desktop. David was shocked by the messiness. She had usually been so neat and tidy, but now it looked like a tornado had ran through it.

Sighing, David walked over to the mini fridge to grab a bottle of water. The fridge, which was usually supplied with bottles of water and salads, was empty. Rubbing his eyes and closing the door, he looked around in the clutter. He could tell that Gillian had suffered while he was gone, that she didn't appear to be the same person she once was, and he hoped it wasn't because of him.

Out from the bathroom that was in the upper part of the trailer, Gillian walked in blowing her nose. She hadn't heard David walk into her messy trailer. She was too busy crying in the bathroom to had heard him. She walked into the living area of her trailer and was startled to find him standing in the middle of it, with a sad look on his face. Gillian stopped in her tracks to look at him. 'This can't be happening,' she thought.

David had changed since last. He had let his hair grow a little longer, and had it styled in a different way. The dark circles that he used to have were gone, and he was clean shaven. David looked better than he did the last time. David turned his head and saw Gillian holding the tissue in her trembling hands.

"Hi," Gillian said shyly in a soft voice.

"Hi," David answered back. 'Why does this seem like this is the first time we've met?' he wondered.

"You...you look...wow...um...you look great, it's been...you know, a long time since..." Gillian stammered out. She couldn't believe herself. Why was she acting like this? She'd known David for over 9 years! Not for like a few months or something. David looked at her and nodded his head.

"Yeah, it has been a long time since we...since we've spoken to each other..." David admitted, as he looked down at the floor. He couldn't stand how bad Gillian looked. She looked tired, drained, unhappy. She looked pale, her bright blue eyes not shining. Her brilliant smile was gone.

"So, um...how have you been?" she asked, breaking the uncomfortable silence that had fallen. David cleared his throat and ran his hand through his hair. "I've been okay, you know... writing here and there, staying at home with West...staying out by her little inflatable pool... oh yeah, and boxing..." Gillian looked up at him. David smiled back and showed her his fists. "Yeah, I'm going go pro...I'll fight people who weight 100 pounds less than me," he said with a chuckle. He hoped he was trying to cheer Gillian up, at least to see her smile. She gave him a small smile and looked up at him.

"Haven't changed a bit, have you? Always trying to make people laugh or smile."

"Yeah, but you look like hell, Gillian. Sorry for putting it that way but you do," David said, his tone serious. Gillian sighed and looked down at the floor, wrapping her arms around her chest. "Yeah," she admitted slowly, "yeah, I've changed..."

David took a step closer to her. He could hear her taking a deep breath and watched her look up at him. He tried to read the expression on her face, but it was blank. He couldn't tell the mood she was in, or what she was thinking. Gillian looked into his open hazel eyes and took a step closer to him. They were close to each other now, they could feel the heat from each other's bodies. This was the way it used to be. It felt familiar to both of them, feeling safe in each other's presence.

"Gillian, can you tell me what's wrong?" David asked in a husky voice. He looked into her face and saw a silent tear fall from her blue eyes and slide down her cheek. He took his thumb to wipe it away, feeling the smoothness of her skin.

"David...I-"

A sharp knock on the door had broken the moment. Meredith swung open the door breathlessly and looked around in the trailer, seeing that David and Gillian had moved away from each other. Rolling her eyes, Meredith spoke;

"Sorry for interruptin, but Mr. Duchovny here has a phone call in the office. I think it's the wife."

David grunted and looked at Gillian, who was looking at him with disappointment. He looked at her and then walked over to the door to where Meredith was standing. "Thanks," he said as he slid past her and ran toward the office. Meredith watched him go and then looked back at Gillian.

"Oh yea, Mr. Manners said to be on the set in 5, you and Mr. Patrick need to finish your scene."

Gillian didn't look up at her. She just stood there with her arms wrapped around her.

Meredith sighed and closed the door behind her, leaving Gillian alone in the trailer.